YOUR Twilight Zone moments...?

Off-topic
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This was inspired by a convo I was having with @RedPandaDL and @neophyte here a bit ago…

Americans and Canadians celebrate Thanksgiving, but on different days: in the US, Thanksgiving is the fourth Thursday of November, whereas Canadian Thanksgiving is the second Monday in October. On one fine, cool, cloudy Canadian Thanksgiving day in 2008, I went up to Canada just for the Heckuvit (or Nunavut :face_with_hand_over_mouth:)…

Weaving through the bordertown, I finally coasted up to the booths of the Canadian Customs…and found it surprisingly bare. No other cars, nothing. But there *was *a guy in a booth, so Target Acquired. Roll on up in the little red sportycar…

The guy in the booth caught me off-guard: he was in his late 40s, dressed warmly but not in his Customs garb…he had civilian gear on. His feet were propped up, kicking out the booth window towards me while he leaned back in his chair against the booth wall and his attention was glued to the portable TV on the counter.

He never made eye contact. “Yeah?”

“Uh…hi there? I’d…like to enter Canada, please.”

“Okay, go ahead.”

Blink. My eyebrow raised. This has gotta be a test. Look around, any others observing me? My car idled happily in neutral.

“Uh, sir?”

“Yeah?” Still glued to the TV.

“Is…everything okay?”

“Sure, why wouldn’t it be?”

“This is extremely unusual for a border crossing. I’ve…never dealt with this before. Don’t you have *any *questions of me? Don’t you care to see my ID?”

Without turning his head, an eye came my way. “You’re an American citizen, right?”

Progress…even if but a little. “I most definitely am.”

Eyes back on the TV. “Good enough. You’re free to enter. Enjoy.”

For a split-second, I stared at the guy. Then hesitantly, uneasily, I put the car in first gear, swept my vision left-to-right as I slowly eased forward, slower than typical, awaiting an ambush by armed Customs Canada guards or RCMP officers the entire time while on Customs property. And for the first 2 miles (3.2 km) off. I was genuinely worried now, but that eased the more I drove. And not one klick faster than posted. No use in provoking in the slightest in a surreal situation like this. So I got in, got my Bisto curry, got my Tim Hortons fix, smoked a Cuban cigar and went home. US Customs was not as lax but at least I wasn’t conversely pulled out, put against a wall with a probe inserted while my car was gleefully disassembled. I relayed to the US Customs guy what had happened earlier; he told me Canadian Customs was on strike. That explained it all.

So. Any surreal moments in **your **life?

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LOL I would be on edge too as I made my way into the country… this ain’t right!!! I usually have a better experience with the US agent compared to the Canadian agents…

I’ll try and think of a Twilight Zone moment of my own!

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Night is full of those moments, isn’t it?

God knows how many I’ve had, but the only one which comes readily to mind is whilst working as a courier on a England to Scotland run.

The work was at night and daytime sleep was hard to get, thanks to all the noisy twats, and I eventually found myself driving through the darkened highlands and hallucinating like crazy from tiredness.

The roadside telegraph and power poles became people stepping out into the road, some pushing prams before them :dizzy_face:

It was a kind of ‘final straw’ moment.

To be honest, I was often so tired on that job, especially by the time I was into the Scottish hills, that all was very dreamlike. Even a herd of deer bounding over the road ahead was just a ho-hum moment, not being entirely sure if it actually happened and not really caring.

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I’ve seen youtubers from Canada cross into U.S no big deal. When they returned to Canada , you could hear the Canadian customs officer interrogating the hell out of the Canadian citizen youtuber almost like if he was guilty of something

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I had an experience like that once at U.S. customs in Niagara New York. We had been shopping all day and got some bargains and after a great cheap Steak dinner we went to the border bridge on a lonely stretch that only seemed to be used by truckers. The guard was watching TV and as we approached the gate he asked what we did all day. We told him a bit of shopping but mostly Bar hopping and dinner. He laughed and said drive on. He never asked how much shopping or to show receipts like they do at the Buffalo border but it was 12 midnight so he may have been bored or tired.

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A similar thing happened to me earlier that year: I drove on up to help a friend with their car for the day and when I got to Customs Canada, I was told they’d picked me at random for inspection. Oh, well, go along with it.

Once in, they demanded the keys and began going through my car as I was walking away, running the drug dogs through it and all else, going through my toolbox; inside, I was taken to a room and stripped of all clothing except my pants, tee and socks while everything had to be put into a bowl for examination. An agent came in and began the interrogation, starting with my Bluetooth earpiece.

“What is this?” he asked tensely.

“This is a Bluetooth earpiece which is paired to my telephone here…” as I touched it momentarily.

“Don’t touch it!”

“But I just wanted to show you the features which allows–”

“I SAID DON’T TOUCH IT!!!”, he barked out. I jumped a bit.

“Hey, ease up, you’re out of line.”

“Don’t…force my hand.”

“I will, right now. Get your supervisor in here.” I was angry but restrained…surprisingly. In came the supervisor, 5 minutes later, and I related to him our discourse. The agent downplayed or denied everything.

“I see you have a surveillance camera,” I challenged, “does it record sound as well?”

“Yes, it does”, affirmed the supervisor.

“I would like a review of this interrogation, please.”

“Look, you’re being irrational he–”, the agent declared, but was cut off by his supervisor, who said “I’ll handle this one.” And the agent gruffly left. No apologies were made by the supervisor but I apologized on my own behalf, asserting that I did not desire conflict, I was in compliance and would continue to be so, provided I was treated politely and fairly. I explained my wallet, phone, Bluetooth and other items in the bowl, as well as the tools and who I’d be visiting to help with their car. The supervisor asked for my ID, the contact’s name and number, then left the room. Before 10 minutes were up, he’d returned.

“Your story holds up. How long do you expect to be in Canada to get this work done?” No longer than 12 hours, I assured. I was told that was fine but to keep as true to my word as possible or there could be consequences. “Whatever”, I thought to myself as I nodded. I robed up, geared up, got to my car with its contents surprisingly still in neatly-arranged condition and drove away, further into Canada. 30 minutes later, I arrived at the contact’s home, the repairs were performed and I made it back to the US Customs with 45 minutes to spare. Being the only one passing through at the time, I was again “selected at random” (compared to whom else here?) for deeper inspection. Great…park, leave the keys with the lot agent, go inside…again.

The guy at the window put a replacement agent at his post and took me off to the side to check me out. No strip-search, no bowl for my goodies, none of that. “You look upset”, he queried. I chuckled a bit, said “This is twice today. What are the odds?” as I then told him all that happened several hours before, going into Canada, which raised his eyebrow sharply, followed by a sigh of disgust. “Are you okay?”

“I’m okay but I had to get assertive in demanding a supervisor, who handled it somewhat better. I was instructed to get in, do my thing and get out…or else.” He shook his head slowly. “Do you wish to file a report about this harassment?”

“No, I’ll be fine. I’m not sure what was going on, a bad day or what but in over 30 years of in and out of Canada, I’d never been treated like that by Customs. I just wanna go home”, I said as another agent handed my inspector some paperwork, which he read.

“You’re clean here. No crimes, no convictions, nothing.”

“I take a great deal of pride in my record.”

“It shows. Look, we’ve had a great deal of complaints recently by other US citizens regarding harassment by Customs Canada; if it ever happens again, do let us know. We’re sorry you had to endure this.”

“I appreciate that,” I said, ruefully, “I just wish they’d apologize, since they did it all.”

“No worries. You’re free to go. Go on and get back home, relax, hopefully it’ll get better by tomorrow. And drive safe!”

Shaking hands, we parted company; I got to my car, with the keys placed atop its roof, got in, started up and drove home. And by next day, things felt much better.

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Are you sure? Maybe that’s they want you to think! You could still be aboard their spaceship! We’ve all heard about Canalien abductions; they could be doing unspeakable things to you, right now!

tumblr_n5bzgsY50n1r9a32bo1_400(1).gif

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Hmmm…never gave it much thought. Seems they changed things up there because all these years we’ve been led to believe Canadians have egg-shaped heads with massive slits for mouths, fart & cackle a lot and drive cars with square wheels. It’s on South Park, so it must be true! :face_with_hand_over_mouth:

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WOW, JUST WOW:exploding_head:, That’s horrible what they did to you!, so it is true, Its not like us U.S citizens are visiting to stay there forever, I know Canada is beautiful but its not were trying to get into heaven:grin:, Canadian border policy procedures should definitely be revised and if they are going to treat tourists like that then I’ll just have to skip ever visiting that country. I’m pretty sure a Canadian authority crossing into the U.S would not like to get his feathers ruffled like that by U.S customs:rage:

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Generally, getting in and out of Canada isn’t at all bad, just ran into an Americaphobe on this one is all. My number came up this time is all. Woot.

But now I desperately need a Timmy’s fix (XL Decaf Double-Double, Chili with Country Bun and jelly Timbits) And hamburgers made from real ground beef. And poutine. Yeah, poutine. Mmmmm… :partying_face:

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Yummm, that sounds really good for this cold weather

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If only GrubHub delivered 500 miles…and internationally… :cry:

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Yeh love chili and country buns and an apple fritter to finish.

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heh

I visited B.C. a few years back (Vancouver). Lovely city (for a city. that park? holy hell! The ‘Lion bridge’? I smooched a lion statue’s nose!)

One thing my American brain failed to grasp? The difference between mph, and kph. Got pulled over by a Mountie (yes, THAT kind of ‘Mountie!’) We had a good convo, we laughed, he warned me to cool my gas pedal paw and my vacation continued on its merry little way.

Also, a HUGE fan of the size of beer mugs the local pub served! Thank god for my local friends and them driving! I may need to visit Germany someday, by all accounts?

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I got zapped in an RCMP speed trap while passing a large hay truck on a remote stretch of kinda-busy highway; the truck was in a 100 km/h (62 mph) zone doing 80 (50 mph) and had been doing so for miles, and when a gap opened, I took it. Little did I know that there was a law in place which forbade overtaking a vehicle more than a few km/h faster than it. I was clocked at 129 km/h (79 mph); one more klick would’ve resulted in custody and a trip into town.

I told the Mountie I wanted to make a statement and he granted it; I told him, in my opinion, the passing laws were dangerous, so he asked why and I observed that because of the law, many Canadians were overtaking others with zero concern whatsoever, forcing oncoming traffic off the road, risking collisions and lives. I’d witnessed this no less than 10 times in the prior two trips into Canada and including twice on this one…and had four times been forced to give way.

What the Mountie did next stunned me…

“You’re right, in my personal and professional opinion. I have to agree…”

My jaw about dropped.

“…but unfortunately, the law is the law and we must enforce it. I have to cite you but I’ll give you the lowest fine possible for ‘disobeying a sign’.”

That was one cool Mountie!

Before I pulled away, I asked a question not many would ask: “Is it legal to drive barefoot in Canada?”

“Sure! Be our guest, eh?” And yes, he actually said “Eh?”.

I called back “Thank you!” as I kicked off those high-tops, stowed them to the right and began the 300-mile leg of the journey…in solid, cool comfort. That coolness only lasted a few hours as when I arrived at Diaper Camp, I got not only teased…but spanked, across the lap with a paddle. Thankfully, diapered. :astonished::face_with_hand_over_mouth::partying_face:

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On my wedding night, the body snatchers replaced my wife with an alien pod. The next morning I found myself in bed covered in pod pieces next to a self centered bitch. (Sarcasm)

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Yeah, but how fast was his fecking horse?!!!

:zany_face:

I’ve driven barefoot loads of times. It’s a weird sensation, especially given the three pedal thing: you always feel like your feet aren’t up to the job of braking. The uneasiness is not too unlike the one you get when you jump into an automatic car and you’re aware that your body isn’t familiar with just two pedals.

It’s kind of a thing in the UK that when somebody borrows an automatic car, you’re waiting for the phonecall telling of a minor bump because they forgot about the pedals (it usually happens at low speed).

:joy:

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The horse wasn’t very fast. It only had one horsepower. :ROFLMAO:

The sportycar was a 5-speed and I greatly prefer sticks to automatics…but sticks are dying out here, replaced by automatics that shift like sticks with no clutch. They don’t know what to say when I call 'em out…

“That an automatic?”

“Nope, stick.”

“Where’s the clutch pedal?”

“Don’t need one.”

“Bulls**t. Lemme know when you wanna learn to drive a real stickshift.” :astonished:

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