So I realized I was a little about 5 months ago. At the time I was in a relationship with my girlfriend and she was more than happy to take on the mommy role for me. She was amazing but things happened and we ended up breaking up a few weeks ago. I’m struggling to say the least but I started having feelings for another girl. I know it’s way too soon to be jumping back into a relationship don’t worry. But this new girl knows about me being a little but she isn’t comfortable being my mommy. So like I guess my question is, is it a bad idea to be with someone who can’t also be your caregiver? And do I really need a caregiver if I went most of my life without having one and only 5 months where I did have a mommy? I’m questioning a lot of things in my mind but one that I can’t stop thinking about is what if I fall in love with someone and everything is perfect but they can’t be my caregiver? Does that mean I shouldn’t pursue them or am I capable of having a healthy happy relationship without who I’m dating also being my caregiver? I just want to know everyone else’s thoughts on this because I don’t even know what I think at the moment.
Simple anwer is OF COURSE you can be with someone even tho they cant (for now /give her time to decide or find out she can do this for you ) or ever ) be youre caregiver.
Being a little is something that is part of our soul and it will always be so thats a part of who we are . She KNOWS this and have accepted this part of you BUT she have also for now made it clear that she cant or arent able to give you this side (ie a caregiver ) and this is something you have to try to accept and look else where for that need (with youre new girls permition of course )
your little will never leave, i would support u in finding someone who want to be your mommy or daddy, what ever u really need.
Thank you that really helps. I guess I’m just scared that what if I don’t realize it but I like neew my girlfriend and mommy to be the same person. I just don’t really know. But thank you, what you said made sense
Thank you so much for sharing your opinion on it. I totally get where you’re coming from and that makes sense. And I’m still so young too so I feel trying different things isn’t an awful thing to do. I’d rather try this good thing despite my anxiety than pass up something that had the potential to be great. Thank you for the advice.
She knows that you are a little so you are past that hurdle. She isn’t comfortable with the mommy role, but does she accept that you’re a little and will allow you to have some little time? If she can accept you, I’d say see where the relationship goes. You two may just end up being friends or it could become romantic. You’re young and have time to explore. Nothing ventured nothing gained.
Thank you yeah it’s complicated because she’s gonna be my roommate so despite anything that happens romantically I’m really hoping she’s not to weirded out when I wanna color with my binky in my mouth and stuffs.
I would really look for a mommy too. I would really be up front, this is who I am, this is what I NEED.. I would be very unhappy if she couldn’t
this sissy legally has to have a caregiver, the state of FL has determined that i need someone (fortunately, this sissy has a Daddy/Master) to take care of my money, (disability check from cancer) my appointments (driving, this sissy can no longer drive), Nurses, (check-ups, and yes, She will change this sissys diaper when She is here), and my general welfare. That’s one reason why HE thinks it best that this sissy just stay a little girl permanently, that way i am not burdened with adult issues and situatons.
My wife was very supportive of my little side, buying me footed jammies, sippy cups, plushies. In fact, I think she enjoyed finding things for my little side, but she didn’t participate as a mommy and that was okay with me. I was glad to be accepted and I could wear diapers whenever I wanted and she didn’t mind. That’s really not a bad deal for those of us who are AB/DL.
Regressing is a lot nicer with a caregive.
Someone to watch over you while you are in Little space. Someone to answer the phone and the door.
However it is possible to regress with out a caregive, it just takes some more organising.
As for new relationships everyone is different, I have found being open is good so the other person know what they are getting in to.
Also respecting the other person’s comfort zone. What they are comfortable with. This is a two way Street as will.
For example if you’re not in to humiliation you might be really uncomfortable if your new caregive goes to far.
Hope all that is helpful
Hugs
soph18 , just wondering how u are doing, daddy is concerned when i dont see that u have been online for support at all, either a great thing to know, or like most daddies, i start to worry, so please let us know , anybody here that u are doing fine or need some support, have to be honest, being u are so close physically i worry more, call me nuts call me anything u want but i do care!!!
I’m doing alright. Thank you for caring. I just don’t come on here every day really.
thats fine just don’t want u to be hurting!
I’ve already provided this sob story a number of times, but it really applies here.
Having a caregiver, that person who understands you and your needs, is the most important thing for an AB/little. The first time someone changed me (as an adult, of course), my emotional world was forever changed. Once you realize what truly touches your emotional core, you can’t ‘put the toothpaste back in the tube’. If you can find that someone with whom you can seamlessly slip into that role with, you realize it’s not an act; it’s you fully-actualized.
Now, I am coming at it from the angle of not having a real DL side or wanting to connect with a caregiver physically; my emotional fulfillment doesn’t come from a sexual bond. That said, I know ABDLs that are able to both connect with that special someone in a big-little sense, as well as the romantic adult manner. However, be sure you know the balance you want between these two sides. To try and force the needle off its natural course only leads to heartbreak.
I’m coming to realize I’m not meant for a typical adult relationship. Unfortunately, it took ruining multiple marriages to do so. Realize who you truly are and don’t try to shush it away. It will only make it take up more of your subconscious and spill over to the other parts of your life, things that have nothing to do with your little side.
Oh, and bonus points for the Dashie avatar. :(y):
I might have written this post myself.
I’m with the person with whom I’m supposed to be; that’s one thing I’m certain of … but she made it clear from the outset of our relationship that my infantilism had no place in our life together. Having been a practicing AB for a number of years, I realized that ‘shushing it away’ wasn’t really an option. While it might work for a short period of time, it’s never going to be a long-term solution.
To date, I’ve had 18 other ladies caring for me. For 3 or 4, it was a one-time thing. The others were all longer term. Many were CNAs or nursing students who had a need for the income. Every single one (even the one-timers) made a point of telling me how much they enjoyed babying an adult and how much fun the job actually was. Quite a few were very apprehensive going in, of course. That typically lasted about 30 minutes.
When I’ve mentioned my paid caregivers on this forum, I’ve had two different responses: Some said they’d never pay for the care, and others accused me of aiding and abetting prostitution, even though (as onecho was careful to note) there’s no sexual component to any of this for me. If you agree with one view or the other, you might as well stop reading this thread and go watch a “Leave it to Beaver” rerun. As others have noted, dating and hoping to find the one woman in a thousand who will accept a lifetime of caring for an adult in diapers is a daunting proposition. I’m glad it happens for some; I have never been that lucky.
I’m still struck by how easy it is to find someone who will provide the care we seek (for a period of time) in exchange for money and by how many ABs deny themselves a chance at happiness by deciding not to even try. I’ve always preferred the ‘sure thing’ to playing relationship roulette, but that’s just me.
Thank you so much for that <3
I hope you can get what u need and be very very happy, u so deserve it!!