Being ABDL is hard in general for I think most of us, but it’s much hard while trying to live around nonunderstanding people. Personally I have to ignore my needs to get by. Meaning I have diaper thoughts often and randomly a lot of the time. It’s kind of a stressful experience. I realize this is in part my own fault, but careless ABDLing can be dangerous. While I enjoy my little or just wearing time, it just seems that being ABDL is more of a curse than a gift. It’s not like all of us have understanding partners or family members, meaning keeping hidden and unknown keeps us safe, but part of being little is usually the affection that comes with it. I wonder how people deal with the all of the limits that have to be in place to themselves safe.
The biggest obstacle is usually ourselves, like the reluctance to accept ourselves. Our dependence on others opinions for validation, stuff like that. Its hard to just LET GO, but that’s what I try to do.
I’m just thankful for my parents being so super supportive
And them being ddlg probs helps XDD cause they fully understand
I’m very blessed to live in a time where I feel this sort of thing is becoming a lot more accepted than before. Maybe it’s just the social circles I run in (lots of oddballs and LGBTQ+), but nowadays, more people of my generation and younger know what “littles” or “DDLG” is and they’re not as hostile to the concept as they would’ve been 15 years ago when I discovered AB/DL. It took me over a decade before I was comfortable enough to come out about my kink to a close friend, but in the past few years alone, I’ve randomly met so many people who either self-identify as littles or therapeutically embrace some aspect of agere or are just plain open-minded who are completely okay with what I’m into. I was always worried about how my AB/DLism would effect my relationships, but I’m very pleased that none of my friends have had any kind of negative reaction to it, and thanks to the internet, I have many outlets to talk candidly about it and make friends through it.
I should emphasize that I’m by no means bragging about how well I live with it; I know many people don’t have that kind of support and people close to them have rejected them because of it, but I guess I just have an optimistic perspective that things are seemingly getting better than it used to be. Slowly, but surely.
I have also felt this way about ABDL being a curse. But only because of lack of understanding and acceptance. People don’t need to understand why we like to wear diapers, I just wish they just accepted it and went “I don’t understand this whole diaper thing but whatever makes you happy” and not judge nor be disgusted by it.
I decided one day I was just going to wear diapers and be thankful my parents let me do it even if my mom doesn’t like it and makes shameful comments and I also decided a guy I meet will just have to accept it in me or he isn’t the one for me. I also went for ABDL men as well so I wouldn’t have to come out.
Don’t understand. In 30 years I have never had to deal with any limits or put any in place to keep myself safe. I couldn’t live like that.
If someone doesn’t understand me we go separate ways - and there are many reasons to go separate ways. We can’t have the whole world as friends. Besides if we did it would cost too much in Christmas cards.
I feel your pain. I’ve had urges to wear diapers since I was five. Even back then, I knew this wouldn’t be a good subject to bring up to my parents, as they would definitely not approve of their son wearing diapers. I grew up never even understanding this part of myself until I was fourteen, but even then it’s been hard. I live in a rural area, at home with my parents. I’ve never indulged, not once, in actual diapers all these years because I fear being caught. I don’t have a proper place to dispose of anything, and hardly ever have the house to myself for more than a few hours. While I doubt their reaction to this would be overly severe, I’ve always known this side of me wouldn’t be accepted by my parents. My mother in particular hates when anyone is acting immature. For an example, she’s often complained about how my cousin (about eight years older than me, in their late twenties), needs to grow up (she likes to cosplay Disney characters). I’ve often heard that and thought, humorously, what could they possibly think of us? They might go the traditional “they’re all freaks” route, or they would otherwise rationalize it. If I had to tell them, they might accept that I have been like this since I was five. Then they would want a reason why, so they could fix it. They would see it as a problem of some sort, something that I had to overcome. There would have to be a cause, a trigger, something that explains it away as a phase that would eventually go away, or as a mental problem that could, with treatment, get fixed. Most of us can attest to the fact that that isn’t the case. Regardless, I don’t ever see them accepting this. It’s the main reason I’ve never brought it up. The best outcome I could hope for is for them to ignore the fact that it exists and let me do what I want in my private life. But, to be honest, I have no idea what reaction they would have. And since the risks of getting caught have always been high, I’ve never indulged. It’s hard, to put it simply. I have to keep this part of me hidden completely, ignoring the urges and otherwise leaving them unexplored. Most of the time it’s easy, but at times it gets very lonely when you have no one to talk about it with. To have to keep an entire part of your personality a secret is a heavy burden to bear, especially when you have no one to go to who can help share that burden. That’s why places like Adisc are a godsend, as we are able to come together and help lift that load, if even a little. I’m waiting until I finish college and get out on my own (sometime in the next year or so, hopefully) to finally indulge in my ABDL desires in real life. I hope you’re able to find that opportunity soon enough. Until then, all we can do is stay here and support each other. Best of luck, and stay safe out there.
-Lightstreak
I forget just how lucky I am. But I never felt bad about my sexuality at least not since schooldays and puberty and I’ve been ‘lucky’ as a post-op TS. I always had one person I could talk to and I had to live and get jobs as a woman to prove my stability, I think I’m polymorphously perverse but I don’t wish I was different . I’ve always been out so made good friends - which are so essential. You NEED positive friends.
And in your private life YOU alone get to tell how much or how little you share. I don’t think intelligent people want to change us. Doctors certainly don’t. Good luck on your journey.
A
Agree with every word!
I HAD to be happy with how I am without caring how others reacted. It is and was my life and people weren’t going to conceal their feelings in case they upset me so I didn’t get upset. I never wished things were different - just that some things didn’t take so long.
And I KNOW I have met some truly astounding friends that I value through being TS and AB. Not everyone knows about those but I don’t hide or disown it if I have the chance to claim it.
I understand how you feel.
For a long time, I have had to “hide” being an Adult Baby.
But, I have my own place, and I can “regress” whenever I want.
But, I still have an “adult” life which has its own demands upon my time even though I am “retired”.
I think fear of being open with people is self-imprisonment.
It’s very hard. I live in a group home and I have choosen not to have my toys or pacifier here for now. I don’t want to be thought of as a guy with the baby doll who sucks a baby’s pacifier. I want people to know me as me. I want my toys so bad, but right now, I’m thinking of others. I love to watch the baby channel in private with just a diaper on, that’s the only time I can be “little.” There are ways to be “little” without toys, and I discover ways to do it every day.
I concur with this thought.
It is a form of “Self-Imprisonment” that can be psychologically damaging.
I understand this, speaking from my own personal experience spanning decades of adult life.
I’m not sure I could be 2 people one an AB the other an Adult one.
I mean the term is ADULT Baby. I’m always in touch with that even if it results in some strange conversations - like telling a mum to be that the Pram she is looking at is just what I’d like or that I wish some of the baby clothes she has bought were available in my size. and so on.
These are not the best examples but you will know what I mean I hope. A young mother turned to me the other day and said 'you know what babies like will you come shopping for Christmas presents with me. I haven’t a clue what Jane and Bill would like but you will have. I did.
I have a long-distance girlfriend in Ohio with Cerebral Palsy living in a Nursing Home, but she has her plushies and dolls with her, and nobody says anything when she is in her room sitting in her wheelchair hugging and cuddling them and her watching cartoons on the television.
It is a gender perception issue.
If you have girl genitalia it is okay to love and play with plushies and dolls, regardless of age.
But if your body has boy genitalia, loving and playing with plushies and dolls is “bad”, with the exception of “playing” with “G. I. Joe”, the romp’n, stomp’n, testosterone-fueled military combat play dolly friend for boys who guns-down and blows up the “Evil” COBRA COMMANDER and his minions.
It sucks that society frowns upon sissy boys and men.
It is a gender perception issue.
If you have girl genitalia it is okay to love and play with plushies and dolls, regardless of age.
But if your body has boy genitalia, loving and playing with plushies and dolls is “bad”, with the exception of “playing” with “G. I. Joe”, the romp’n, stomp’n, testosterone-fueled military combat play dolly friend for boys who guns-down and blows up the “Evil” COBRA COMMANDER and his minions.
I have a god child who plays ball, wrestles, and has a bedroom full of plushies. He thinks GI Joe is ‘Boring’ (said with disdain.)
I know a family with a very feminine boy and all people say about him is how he plays the piano so well. They say nothing about his dolls.
“It sucks that society frowns upon some sissy boys and men”.
My society doesn’t. We have nothing to do with those who do.
I think we’ve come a long way since 55.I don’t know any children like those you describe.
Completely Agree! I don’t know about anywhere else but in England anybody who accepts his difference and is able to talk about is considered Interesting for his difference.With something new to offer.
Well . . . I can understand why people on the outside are not-accepting of AB’s It is hard when you think of someone saying to another ‘I just love pissing my pants!’ Put simply, robbed of all the baby clothes and general culture of AB’s it’s pretty hard for ‘straights’ to get their head around. I used to live in Englands answer to California - Brighton where everything was allowed and tolerated by most people. Here I am now where I don’t think there are any gays. And I am sure that there is not another TS. And nobody knows about me..
In Brighton they did.